Ilang km tinakbo at binyahe, MASL inakyat,
skills na natutunan, luha na iniyak,
oras na inilaan, hirap na pinagdaanan,
at sa pinaka lahat ng naging mahalaga na kaibigan at pamilya,atbp. Sabi nila life changing dito sa UP Mountaineers,
life changing nga at katulad nga noong sabi ng kanta
- it's more than a feeling.
I still have a long way to go but I'm doing my best. Maraming salamat Mabuhay UP Mountaineers!
- Grant, Batch 2015B - Buhawi
Last 2015, I applied for the UP Mountaineers. It started out with the applicants orientation at UPD Arki, I was late but immediately signed up and bought a "May the Forest be With You" shirt which is one of my most favorite shirts to this day. I had no idea what was in store for me when I signed up. I've had some experience hiking with friends and through my forestry course having plenty of fieldwork at Mt. Makiling but what I have learned in UPM is so much more. I got the schedule and added it to my calendar.
38 years! (U)
2015 Apps Orientation (D)
In the first Basic Mountaineering Course Lecture (BMC 1) I was super duper close in being late and that was the B schedule too! I almost didn't make it but thankfully I got there 2-3 minutes before time. UPM has a very strict rule on being late wherein you are dropped from the application process or have to repeat activities if you are late, the infamous "late is late" rule which inspires everyone to do their best to arrive on time. It's a good rule which I think builds respect for other people's time and discipline. There are times when I am still late but through UPM being on time has been quite ingrained in me.
The application process lasts for an entire semester which is 6 months but in my case it extended to 2 years! Applying was a big sacrifice for my schedule, every weekend would be booked for a lecture, activity, or climb. Even my weekdays were affected for preclimbs, postclimbs, and runs! Since I go to school at UP Los Banos, everytime I had to go to a UPM activity on a weekday I would travel from UPLB to UPD and go back to UPLB on the same day while on weekends I would go from Paranaque to UPD. Honestly, it was incredibly draining and tiring and the anxiety was high since I had a bigger chance of being late coming from such a far distance. But even though it was difficult seeing my friends and all the mems who were so helpful and encouraging kept me going.
Environmental Activity 1 (EA1) - Birdwatching and Treewalk (U)
Orienteering review I think? (D)
A memory I vividly remember was the environmental activity (EA 1) which was the first time I was late! I soon attended EA 1B again. This was where I met my first new friends, Jamie, Bryan, Macy, and Eisson. Though most of them did not continue I am glad to have met such nice people especially Jamie being one of my closest friends in the org and most supportive of me throughout the entire process. From letting me sleepover at her place to attend the lectures early the next day to driving me back to the MRT station so I can get home easily and listening to me in my troubled times, she's helped me so much. (love you jamie ! thank you for everything!)
Other good friends I've made early on the process was Cat, Jed, Pio, and Dom. I felt comfortable being with them since we were from the same college batch and had the same ages. They always made me feel welcome and treated me kindly. During this time I didn't have much friends (or at all) in UPLB and I was thankful to them for being there for me. I finally had UP college batchmate friends! :D From continuing the app process Cat like Jamie was also very supportive, we went to the lectures, written exams, and activities together and she would always cheer me on let me sleep over and remind me that we could do it. She's also the most kindhearted friend I have who cares for puppies and wellbeing of others. (Thank you also for everything Cat! Love u!)
I really appreciate the Environmental Activities in UPM because it highlights that mountaineering also involves appreciating and enjoying the outdoors in different ways. I am familiar with the practices because those are some of the things we do in forestry. It's a big bonus being a iker with knowledge of biodiversity and different species because it allows you to have a deeper connection with nature. It's wonderful that UPM inspires their applicants and members to love and care for the environment through activities like birdwatching, tree walks, lectures and tree planting.
The Environmental Activity 2 (EA2) tree planting at Ipo Watershed was definitely one of the most memorable experiences i've had. It was during our EA2 that I planted a Narra tree which I hope continues to grow healthy and big. The place was beautiful yet finding out about the reality of the struggle the land is currently going through is heart breaking. This was when I saw how UPM really takes their role for caring for the environment seriously. UPM Environmental Committee projects like Green is Good have been very active in taking care of tree planting sites and engaging with the local community. The EnCom's passion is commendable and inspiring. One of the things that I love the most about this org! Someday I hope to apply what I've learned from forestry. Knowing that there are people out there who are passionate in making a change for the betterment of the environment keeps me on track and shows me that there is purpose in what I'm studying. Most of them even get excited over trees more than I have ever been!
Tree Planting (U)
Ipo Watershed (M)
Green is Good (EA2) (D)
Another aspect of UPM that has changed me is the physical aspect specifically running. Before UPM the farthest I've ever ran was 3km. So the first 6.6km diagnostic run was a challenge for me. Thankfully there was no cut off time but it still took me quite a while to finish the run. In preparation for the 10km I ran every other day at UPLB and even went to UPD on some Mondays to run the oval. I was slow but I built the stamina for running. Having no background in sports, it was a challenge for me. The dreaded 10km came and I ran the course 3 times! The first 2 I got lost and was not fast enough so I didn't make Climb 2A but after more runs and the support of Freddie I finally made it just in time! I literally felt like I was gonna die from exhaustion after 10km plus fast speed within cut off time, it was hard for a non runner.
Climb 2B 10km run
10km UP route
The biggest most intense challenge in terms of running for me was 2 years later this 2017. Fast forward to our induction run which was the DBB Mountain Rockstars 25km trail run. After my continuing app status on 2015 I barely had any run training outside of UPM, I was mostly swimming. I've tried to train 3 months before the trail run from swimming to running at UPLB on my free time outside of work and school. In 2015, the distance of 10km was incredibly tiring for me but in the present to train for the 25km, my regular runs were 13-15km which was a big difference from before. I didn't realized how much I've improved in running. A big setback occurred though because in the span of those 2 years I've gained so much weight from my medication that made me heavier and slower in speed. I still have the stamina but my speed incredibly decreased.
The day of the trail run came and and I was nervous and scared. It was my very first trail run and I did not know what to expect. I even wore running shoes because I did not own any trail shoes and my hiking shoes were boots. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. The trail was incredibly hard and it rained then it stretched out for so long. So many times I've thought of turning back and giving up and just quitting. Physically, I had the stamina but lacked the speed to catch up with everyone else. The organizer's original cut off time (which was then removed because the difficulty of the trail was underestimated) was 8 hours but I ended up finishing it in 13 hours!! I pushed myself to finish the entire thing as much as I felt like I was dying and wanted to completely give up but the patience of the sweeper Tin helped me so much. I reached the finish line and was expecting to be welcomed by friends but I was all alone and the fear mixed with disappointment at myself I just ended up crying on the ground after the run. I told myself I would never do again. It was only weeks and months after when I realized that the distance, the shoes, and the circumstances were not in my favor. With the right trail training, shoes, and distance I am willing to try it again.
DBB Mountain Rockstar 25km - Mt. Batolusong
Throughout the run the words of my friends and 2016 batchmates Raph and Des echoed in my heart. Des told me to take it one step at a time and focus on what's infront of me instead of worrying about reaching the end immediately. Raph said I should push through and not see it as a competition but to finish it and not give up because it is when I give up that I lose. I was amazed I even finished 25km which is something I never imagined I could do. This was one of the many things UPM unlocked for me.
2016 Apps Orientation
I became a continuing app because I was late for one Environmental Lecture, I cried and thought it was over but apparently there was still a way for me to continue. It was a year later, 2016 that I was able to take my written and skills exam. And it was also the year when I made new family. I was so scared of being continuing because I thought I wouldn't make any friends from the new batch but I was wrong. Batch TagTag 2016 became my batch at heart because they were the most welcoming, supportive, wonderful, and most solid people I've met in the org. I was just a continuing app but they welcomed me as their own. From helping each other out in the mega reviews to the encouragement and all the fun from beachineering to skills review. TagTag definitely became family. Being late for that EL and taking the exams later was a blessing in disguise because through that I was able to be a part of batch 2016 and had I taken it the first time around I'm sure I would have failed with lack of focus and review.
Beachineering - Batch TagTag 2016 Mt. Daguldol hike + Laiya beach
I took the written and skills exam twice. I didn't make it the first time around which crushed me but thankfully UPM friends were there to support me and believed in me when I tried it again. Thankfully I passed. Initially I was shocked and couldn't believe it but Rolly said it was true and that I did pass! The skills test was one of the fondest memories I have of the app process. It was definitely hard but being with batchmates and friends just kept me going. During the skills test Mei, Des, Nono, and Donna encouraged me to do my best and even on my retake they were all there for me. Happiness is when we all passed and made it! <3
One of the best friends I've made in Batch TagTag is Des. He is a silly and understanding person who helped me out and believed in me until the end. Thank you Des for your kindness and support that always reminds me that things will be okay. I love talking to you and listening to you and Matt too like the one at Daguldol. I'm thankful to have made such a great friend.
Skills test at Basekamp
Of course the main part of UP Mountaineers is the actual hiking and mountaineering. Throughout the process we went through 3 climbs - Climb A, Climb B, and Induction. In these climbs I wasn't the strongest but I never gave up. My stamina could do it but my speed was not as fast especially when I gained weight. When I had less weight it was quite easier for me to be quicker since Climb 1A at Bungkol Baka was a great pace for me. That was my first climb with UPM with our TL Ethel and my groupmates Megan, Nelo, Jamie, and Trisha. I remember we ate sinigang for dinner and our socials was a rap battle called "Bungkol Battle". I had no camera at that time so the only photos I have were the one's taken by Jamie. I was really sad that time but I tried to look forward at the view and the good things from the climb.
Climb 1A - Mt.Bungkol Baka
Climb 2B was at the Pinagheneralan trail of Mt. Banahaw. Since the trail is closed for the public the path was wild and not established and along the trail were killer ants. I was quite down during this hike too and didn't get enough sleep but tried to make the best out of it. The mossy forest of Banahaw was beautiful and we told ghost stories and had socials when we got to the campsite. The mountain felt special and had some sort of magic because climbing it was different compared to regular trails. We were the only ones there and the wild trail made it challenging. I had to improve on alot of things on this climb from speed to preparation and confidence but I learned from my groupmates and our GL Bricx + TL Dora.
Climb 2B - Mt. Banahaw, Pinagheneralan trail
The last climb as an app and the most difficult one I have ever experienced not physically but emotionally. The 25km trail run was a great help in preparing me for the climb. I was not the fastest but we were on time our itinerary and no matter how incredibly sad and stressed I was I never gave up and pushed through. In this climb I've seen different sides of people and it showed me how different we all are and that we all have our own struggles in life so it's best to treat eachother with kindness and do our best to be open to others and be understanding no matter how hard it may be. I needed a few months to recover mentally and a few days physically. I'm grateful to our TL Biel and our GL John and the rest of the climb crew for the patience and making sure things are okay.
Induction Climb - Mt. Ugo
Mt. Ugo sunrise
After the induction climb, instead of feeling accomplished I felt disappointed at myself. I questioned if I was really good enough or deserving to be UPM not being fast enough or as strong as others were. I doubted myself and felt sad but on the jeep back I talked to Chloe and she told me that I should be proud and instead of being overwhelmed by the negative things, see that there is also a positive side.
Years back on my old account I made a long post about how UPM has affected me emotionally but that post has been lost along with my account. So I will take the time again to express how I feel. Mentally, I'm not the strongest or stable person, I am diagnosed with anxiety and depression which has haunted my life for as long as I can remember. In the year I applied 2015 that was a very rough year for me. After recovering from suicide attempts and having difficulty living life I didn't know what else I should do with myself. I started out telling myself that I'll try UPM out and if it doesn't work out it's okay but I got so much more than what I imagined. From being too stressed to wake up and live life, I ended up running 10km and climbing mountains!
The most important thing I learned from UPM is to believe in myself and to truly love the outdoors from the difficulty to its beauty. Depressed me could never have imagined I would be able to do those things throughout the app process. Existing and doing things takes so much effort for me and I have to put in double and triple the effort to function like normal humans. I am not as fast, as strong, as skilled, or as incredible. I fail multiple times before I learn and improve. I improve but at a slow and steady pace. Instead of berating myself for not being good enough or comparing myself to others I've learned to look back and acknowledge how far I've gone. I'm here now, I continue to exist, and I was able to do it. It was hard but I conquered myself. I unlocked new skills I never thought I had. Climbed heights I didn't know I would ever reach.
Never ever has someone in UPM called me weak but instead everyone always says that I can do it. With the right training and enough practice I too could improve and be stronger. There is always that culture of encouragement and striving to be a better version of yourself that I learned in UPM. Every step of the way there was someone to push me up and help me get to the goal. I always say I may not be the strongest but I never give up. No matter how hard it can be or impossible. I fail many times and keep on trying again and again until I reach it.
Through the org I've met wonderful people who would be there for me in my journey. Jamie, Cat, Des, Julia, Bing, Dino V., Jujoe, Biel, Cha, Solo, Diwa, Thumbie, Ethel, Patreng, Nono, Reyhan, Freddie, Ruel, Rolly, Ara, Jennifer O., Raph, Tammy, Donna, Bram, Chloe, Jansen, Kat V., Bricx, Sieg, Mei, Lee, Matt, Batch Buhawi, Batch TagTag, and everyone who was there. (Sorry I couldn't list/mention everyone but know that I'm thankful for you all.)
Now being a member I feel that it's just the beginning. Right now I want to get better, I want to improve, I want to be fit (and to lose weight), to bike, to run, and to continue experiencing the outdoors. Being outdoors and physically active has been very good for my mental and physical health and I'm thankful to have been introduced into this world. When I was still an applicant I told myself, "I can't wait to reach you, UPM" and so I did and it's one of the best decisions I've made in my life. Life changing nga dito sa UP Mountaineers and it's more than a feeling.
Maraming maraming salamat at mabuhay UP Mountaineers!!
